America Almost Faced Another Twinkie Epidemic And You Probably Didn’t Even Know
Every couple of years, it would appear that a particular and unique epidemic sweeps The United States of America. The cause of this specific event is not due to a plague, famine or drought. No, this disaster that looms over the nation like a dark shadow is far more sinister and threatening to our beloved pop-culture. You might ask yourself what this threat might be, and you would be wise to do so. The disastrous event that we are referring to is popular junk foods going out of business and losing their shelf life. You might scoff and mock such a thing as trivial, but rest assured that the threat is very real.
Remember back in 2012, when Hostess announced that they were going out of business because of labor strikes? Some of you on the internet might be too young to remember what those dark days were like, but the outrage and support that came for Hostess’s prime product, Twinkies, was overwhelming and frightening. For some reason, people really lost their minds over Twinkies going away forever.
People ran to their nearest grocery stores to stock up on as many twinkies as they could possibly buy. It was sort of like a Black Friday event, but just for Twinkies and other less popular Hostess products. The event only became more absurd when people started trying to sell their twinkies on the internet for unbelievable amounts of money. With an unreasonably high level of demand and no continuous supply, people started trying to resell their “Golden Sponge Cakes with Creamy Filling” on eBay for tens of millions of dollars. Some asked for the price range of over twenty million dollars. Others were more modest and asked for the still ridiculous price of one million dollars for a single box.
Many who tried to resell these products were claiming to be doing so in the name of charity and philanthropy. It is unknown whether any of these boxes of Twinkies sold on the internet, but if anyone bought them, I’m sure they were upset when they found out that Twinkies were back on store shelves less than six months later.
The incident was a strange and isolated one. Never before had Americans been threatened with losing such an iconic and unhealthy treat before. We had hoped that we would never be tested so intensely again.
Are Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups Going Away?
For many years, there was peace. However, that peace was disrupted last year when a parody news site, BreakingNews365.net, announced that Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups were going to be gone forever after October 2017.
As you can imagine, this did not sit well with the internet. Despite there being no proof that this was actually going to happen, the people of twitter generated much fury on the internet. One Twitter user led the outcry by tweeting: “Are you guys seriously about to ruin lives just like that ?!!!? .. please tell me this is a rumor 😓💔 please 🙏🏾@ReesesPBCups”
Thankfully the official Reese’s Twitter account was quick to reply and put an end to such fears by routinely sending out replies to the tweets such as this one.
In the end, it looks like America was spared of suffering another nightmare-inducing Twinkie-pocaylpse. Thankfully, Reese’s are not going anywhere, as they are quite delicious. However, thinking on how quickly a massively successful product such as Twinkies was able to go, one can’t help but wonder what food product might be next on the chopping block. We just hope that Oreo’s are safe forever.